Switch Index Finger to Thumb

“Kalau tengah marah, jangan bercakap sebab yang tengah bercakap tu ego.”

(Hanis Zalikha’s FB status update)

Absolutely true! The second big Ego Accident of my life cost me full regret every time I go to sleep. The FB status, which I discovered tonight, reminds me of,

  

 “Kalau kita marah, orang akan nampak yg kita marah, bukan mesej yang kita nak sampaikan. Acik (makcik) guru disiplin tak bawak rotan pun, guna pendekatan psikologi.”

(Makcik X, my relative)

Very useful advice. The good thing about me is that I never hide my true emotions most of the time. What you see is what inside. Okay, not a 100% of it but yes, most often.

However, I am not one who expresses anger by negligence and silence. I respond with voice. To be specific, loud voice which is full of amplified negative energy.

Still, people closed to me are not haters. Alhamdulillah.

After we lashed a person, our anger might be soothed down, but what about the internal consequences on that other person whom we yell at? Our problem will not settle.

You know how it feels like to be hurt, how it feels when someone treats you the way you’re unpleasant of, then why do the same?

By the way, at the end of my conversation with Makcik X, she said, “Bagus dia ni. Pendengar yang baik.”

Pendengar Yang Baik a.k.a. A Good Listener

Eid Fitri passed by so fast, until one night at Beit Zahra’, Abou Risy,

N: "Bagus kan M ni, dengar je."

L: "Eh… M memang pendengar yang baik. Aku bercakap dia dengar je."

Really? A good listener?

Because I slept for a while during Communication lecture today. I blame inappropriate passion to finish an article I've to submit this December. Hehe. 

Amoi 1 & 2: Bring self control in your pocket, M.
M: Since I'm already as ugly and boring as my writings.

p/s: sleeping in a lecture is a catastrophic tragedy, boys and girls. Jot that down at once! Grr. 

Twelve Primitive Colours

“Though quiet she can produce good work. Results are satisfactory. Keep it up. “

Such was what my kindergarten teacher’s left in my progress card for the first and second semester.

Actually the first thing I discovered yesterday evening was my kindergarten certificate stating,

“On the recommendation of the faculty hereby confers on (my full name) who has satisfactorily completed the required studies – The Degree of Bachelor of Rhymes.”

Cool…  My first degree! Haha.

I was a quiet girl in kindergarten. I scarcely know everyone in my class. I only recognized few names. I was afraid to talk with other children sitting away from me. Hence the B’s for ‘Friendship’ column in the report card.

Today, I know every Malaysian student names from my batch in Cairo and eager to know more about them.

I’ll never forget a girl sitting in front of me. Whenever we have to use colour pencils, she’ll take out one pencil at a time while others are hided below the desk. That action always caught my eyes.

“How paranoid! As if everybody wants to steal your Faber Castle. Oh come on… WEIRD!” 

I thought.

It was weird, although I do envied a Faber Castle big set like those. But I’ve forgiven that behaviour due our age. Toddlers make mistakes, alright?

And I, the proud owner of Steadler Noris Club coloured pencil, who went insane when it was gone before found on that very small display table next to kitchen, could care less concerning the overrated Faber Castle. Muahahaha!

Tremelbye Kidergarten memories 1997.

 

I didn’t find the picture of year 1997 packaging.

(credits to Staedtler)

Twenty Six

I am happy I am able to spend my summer with my family.

I was sad and anxious during the last seconds the plane started to land.

Will I be a different person, or will I return to the way I was? Will the bad people I've encountered during my rebellious teenage point finger at me, telling everyone that I was once guilty?

Alhamdulillah, it is day 26 of fasting. No such bad people came to me to grin or even point their fingers on my face to my disgrace. 

Adventurous high school moments. This morning I found a button badge signing, "Badan Disiplin SAMTH 2008" while clearing up my cupboard. 

"Disiplin?" I laughed.

A school prefect I was, a bad judgement the teacher who recommended me for prefect candidate had. To think again, I think I was a 'corrupted prefect'.  I didn't do much for school and definitely, I didn't want to mess up with other students. 

I must make good ties with the goodies and the baddies.  So what if you bring cell phone, your scarfs do not follow school's standards, I don't care. As long as you were not rude to me. 

"Siapa yang bagitau cikgu yang H bawak handphone ni?" stressed out, I asked one of my innocent colleagues.   

Gangster much? Muehehe. Since then, the  classmate who was suspected telling the teacher about the phone was hated for the rest of our fifth year in that school. Of course, by my two girls, including H herself. Oh yeah padan muka.

Then there were my awards, just some school's achievements stuff. I have rights to brag about me being the only student in my school who got 1A for English for Science and Technology (EST) for SPM examination. 

After all, what else can I boast about since my Final Exam score this semester was only Jaiyid Jiddan (read: Good, which is lower than Best). As expected, horrible Microbiology marks. 

"So Mr. Microbiology Muggle, do you think I REALLY care about that Jaiyid grade? I DON'T (teasing face)...!"

We have bigger issue. Ramadhan is leaving us soon... Hmm. 

Selamat menyambut lebaran!

p/s: Wahai semangat Ramadhan, sentiasalah terserap dalam setiap gerak-geriku. Kau pasti akan dirindui. Isk!

Hold Your Position

Talking about Monday morning sense of humour,

Housemate S: Is this what it's like to be medics students?
Me: Which part, the infinite syllabuses or the last minute studying (referring to myself) part? Hahaha.


The above was before we left house for Pharmacology Paper 1 exam. I remember my promise at the beginning of semester. I'll reward myself a solid jade bangle if I exceed my former grades record. 


Keep that in our empty Borio chocolate sandwich biscuits. We got bigger issue:

Paper 2 Pharmacology, Clinical Pharmacology, oral Pharmacology, theoretical Microbiology, theoretical Parasitology and oral Parasitology. Tadaa... they made number 3 (3 subjects) take long time to accomplish. 

Alhamdulillah, all Pathology exams have end. 0.5 kg unloaded. This week is ultimate week of Pharmacology, boys and girls.


It's nearly the end of third year. The summer heat and Final Exams are finish line. Do not know what waits in the next race, but right now, all we have is the present time. 


Apart from being distracted between worry for exams and ambitions to execute for summer vacation, a tiny matter I name, 'Standards Stocks'. The more anxious you become, the lower standards you put. Like how investments roll, if they are risky, people take back their money to avoid loss. 


Opening semester: JADE BANGLE
Summer gate: DEAR, I JUST WANT TO ENTER FOURTH YEAR


I took back my money=efforts from investing into jade bangle. I went for a less risky one, the Fourth Year. Surely, with the same amount of efforts. Not a 'penny' reduced though I moved to a much cheaper stock. 


Obviously, to avoid a form of loss, severe disappointment due to high standards not consummated. 
Hee.


Amoi 1: The form of escapism, blame it on your endogenous opioid peptides, if you got what I mean...
M: Wink!

Talking about two days before the very first Pharmacology paper,


Housemate L: Would you like to go out? (Kitten face)
M: Yeah, I know you need a pal for baking ingredients search. Tension much? No, I would not... Hahaha.


Poor girl.


Amoi 2: You're so mean!
M: Eh?


To ease mind from book hours, some go out for a walk, some may bake. Like this little cute girl. 


p/s: thabat makanak.

One Image

FOCUS

 It was interesting. It was One Legacy Radio. A radio station filled with talks. There was a segment called, ‘Serenity’. The presenter was a female. She mentioned the word, ‘focus’ millions of times. The word stroked my heart.I humped a big load. 

Not sure what was the topic, I figured the whole speech was closely related to sincerity, how we FOCUS our intentions for the sake of Allah. 

We all have different struggles. Different patterns to match our capabilities. She mentioned ‘mujahadah’ too. As if understanding the struggle I’m going through every day where in certain circumstances I said,

“I’m so afraid of my own self.”

“I’m so tired I don’t change much.”

and

“Waa… I’m ugly outside and inside. I’m someone no one will marry." Dramas much? Tunjil kepala baru tau.

Amoi 1: Definitely overreacting.

M: Just kick me, ladies. :P

Turned left.  A white board written, 

FOCUS. The best doctor Muslim in the making.

The fact where our visions get blurred sometimes.

The fact suddenly, a voice on radio repeating one of  words you jot on white board.

or

That critical moment, your chocolates are finished. Your hands twirling for more.  You walk back and forth in your own spacious room, mild addiction. Okay ignore this. Ngee~

p/s: Pseudomonas, Escherichia coli, Shigella, Salmonella typhi, Proteus...sequence rhyming in my brain.

        Settle the bacteria, will settle the antibiotics. The Pharma-day will come soon.

       

Amoi 2: Tell me, your kitchen?

M: Cockroaches. INFESTATION! Kill them kill them all. Grr. 

Yellow Memos

Captured Moment. Friends I love.

                     

A: Mari aku ‘sWEET’kan kau.

B: …

A: PheeeWEET…

B: … -_______- (What duh?)

Me: (Genius!) 

Time Machine. Valued Archive.

His last days (with too few loyal friends) really broke my heart.






Being Too Hard on Others. Useful Advice.

"Jangan sampai Adik benci kau."

[Mak] 

Since then, I promised to make him happy as much as I can.

p/s: apology to whom I expressed my verbal fury in inappropriate ways. I left too many scars.


Amoi 1: Jangan sampai kawan benci kau dalam diam.
Amoi 2: Maintain cuteness. 

Opera

Terlalu banyak sudah berlaku. Apa mahu dicuba telah terlaksana. Cubaan hari-hari genting kini pula meliputi jasmani, rohani, mental dan kewangan. Biasalah, duduk di bumi kinanah ni banyak bentuk ragam supaya otak tak jemu. Tiap tahun pasti dicabar. Macam masalah Matematik, corak masalah yang diberi berlainan tapi formula tetap sama.


 Lagi, ada beberapa hal belum selesai. Semoga berjalan lancar. Peperiksaan dan pengembaraan.


Kewangan? Tentulah sebilangan perkara yang ingin dicuba memerlukan pengorbanan berbentuk tambahan belanja untuk babak terjunan terbaru acara kehidupan . Istilah kolonialnya, 'gamble'. Tidak ada detik lain. Mesti sekarang juga aku melepaskan diri dari ikatan ketakutan terhadap kesempitan. Aku nak bebas. Namun, logiklah dengan perancangan. Tak ku kira berapa hari sudah satu jenis kemewahan itu aku tinggalkan. 


Pasang senyuman neutral, dahi menghala ke radiasi mentari dan kaki terus melangkah banyak-banyak. Siapa lagi jika bukan diriku yang terlebih dahulu mendidik jiwa sendiri. 


Aku namakan sesi 2011/2012 Tahun Keberanian.


p/s : Yang bawah sini buat hatiku sayu:


Berlayar berbelok-belok,
Sawah dibongkar di tempat tenang;
Yang tinggal hati tak elok;
Yang pergi hati tak senang


Cuba teka dari mana aku petik bunga - bunga kata di atas? 

Insects

Girls tend to make conclusions.


Thereby, as one who keeps complete set of karyotype 46+XX, I shall say  that I put foul words (conclusions) behind people's back. Not everyday, just that particular day. Dah berabad aku tak kutuk orang sebegitu. I was relieved temporarily but now feeling bad. 


My usual fashion is face to face. 
Suddenly, it just happened. I have insignificant reason for those conclusive, assumptive words. I was so angry and annoyed. See, so irrelevant, illogical reason. I am ready to know anyone feeling of stomping me. Anyone who noticed my rude unconscious acts or heard me slamming heartbreaking words about them. I will by person, say sorry and this is NOT an apology post. Just to remind, whatever happens, I do not hate you. I sincerely love everyone.


Not to mention,  from the first day we know each others' faces caused bad impression. My dear, the second thing I knew about you was untidiness, worsened by your action of letting go small rubbish pieces to the floor. I just can't help with that kind of stigma on people throwing rubbish or piling stuffs on the floor. 


When I was in high school, I saw my friend throwing away bus ticket onto the ground.


"Selalunya aku tak suka org buat macam tu." I was stunted by my words too. Was that me? Erk. 


I always want to say this ever since first year being undergraduate. Unfortunately, it became an unsettled business until it broke into talking behind people's back. I want to say THE small matter directly but I can't. People might denounce me anti-social. There, bad conclusions once more.


I take NEATness really serious. I do not mean I am infinite tidy, well-groomed or fancily appareled whatsoever. I am very practical and needing better management in life. Needless to say, you can just tell whether or not selekeh is selekeh. Let's say if I stain my hijab with gravy, I'll bravely say, "Ish, selekehnya aku." But that is not an issue, not the definition to be stressed on. Just clean the greasy spot, like a pro. Tadaa...


I would like to correct a statement which claimed, "Yang penting (good virtues, heart etc...), ish tak baik aku jadi org tak bersyukur." Criticizing our own self does not lead  toward ungratefulness. Ungratefulness sounds like this,


"I hate my cheeks. It's not as anorexic as the models up there," says Tina Hyena during a runway show.


or


"Yeah, yeah, yeah... Lots of 'progression'. What are my sins to be borne in this dirty poor family?"


Personally, it's right to question if we did our appearance conveniently or just another scene of mess. It's right to say you're selekeh if you try fixing what to be fixed, later on, because selekehness is another subject, totally further apart from the entity of ungratefulness.


Returning to the main idea, selekeh/untidy in my opinion means:-

• dirty
• messy
• excessive eating
• excessive complaining, not trying to endure a bit of hardship
• bad body posture

Amoi 1: The paradoxes of above list are M's 2013 New Year's resolution.
M: To vanquish inappropriate tendencies.


Bad body posture? (take care of your bones, ladies!)

Amoi 2: Pop Pop Pop Tebabo [sound effects]
M: ...




p/s: essay drilling is vital.

Child

Jika aku anoreksia esok, aku berjaya... Secara serius, hilang segala nafsu makan. Dulu aku telan segala, buat masa ini obsesiku melewati semua. Barangkali aku harus bercampur lebih kerap. 


Aku rindu taulan sekelilingku tapi wahai buah-buah hatiku, biarlah jasad dan roh ini melangkah cekap sepenuhnya. Sekiranya tak mustahil, baik membisu terus dengan alasan malu dengan hasil lepas. 


Berikan aku dalam 2 bulan untuk jalankan pelan tindakan ala-ala  diet pesakit kencing manis. Aku sendiri pun gentar pada saat mencabar diri sendiri. Harap-harap taulan tak nampak aku macam hantu atau berpenyakit jiwa. Nama pun obses, bukan Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, apatah lagi Reactive Attachment Disorder.


Sudah, fikiranku optimis. Mahu atau paksa, rekod baru mesti diukir. Aku bersaing dengan gelodak darah mudaku, bukan jiwa asing. Inginku cantas hasutan tak berpatutan dalam kepalaku sehabis-habisnya. 


"Kalau latihan intensif ini semata-mata musibah kutipan mata yang lemah, aku ingkar."


Definisi fokus yang lebih kuat menurut imanku ialah khusyuk. Semakin gagah pergolakan dalaman, semakin terasa lebih dekat denganNya. Juga semakin tampak tanda-tanda doaku pasti dimakbulkan atau ditawarkan nilai lebih baik. 


Biarlah beberapa tempoh menjadi sudut aku berunding dengan jiwaku tentang susun atur perkataan, tingkah laku dan pemikiran supaya saling harmonis. Jika laut tak mampu disediakan, bumbung langit cukup sahaja menyaksikan.






p/s: latihan karangan gaya SPM. Bahagian saintifik nak berasap. Hampir rebel agaknya. Keh3. 
Arghh, pe kejadahnya semalam tonton tentang  Beth Thomas, aku pun tak tahu. 

When I Adopt

Orang

oleh Fynn Jamal

apa ditimang anaknya orang

benih sendiri disindir-sindir

apa dimenang bagusnya orang

hendak berdiri diusir-usir

asal terpuas bahgianya orang

biar terbunuh nyawa di badan

demi dilekas hendaknya orang

biar tak penuh hajat di rawan

p/s: spread the love and appreciate people around you

Hey Baby

Laziness made me slept from 10.28 pm to 2 am with contacts on. The last song before I shut my eyes was Cold Shoulder by Adele. Played perfectly in this succulent Cairo's coldness. One that bites joints. 


"When will spring come???! Rawr!" The old school friend gasped.

Almost 12 noon at Learning Resource Centre, Kasr el-Ainy. CPR steps were all mixed up. Felt fat. At least a piece of cuteness remains.


Amoi 1: Say what?!!! 
M: Cuteness is not me. This refers to my wild hands. They're cute with wounds due to negligence. Winter malfunctions. Yucks.

(Betulkan muncung tudung.)




One day in the train, I looked to one local little girl with a type of thought. 


"This child soon grow bigger. Soon be the future."


The hope. The ticking clock. 


lalalalalalalala
lalalalalalalala
lalalalalalalala
FinalExamlala


At the time being, June seems so close now. 3 months do make huge difference than 54 days. Like between 1 week and 7 days. 

Alright... Let us make this post fatter. Because you just can't feed a blog post with chocolates. Duh... 

Found this months ago on my brother's FB wall. 

My brother is my love.  

Chocolates Unite

Monday breakfast desert was Pharmacology Quiz. 

"Indomethacin is one of the MOST potent COX enzyme inhibitors, NOT aspirin."

Later, moment I've been waiting for. It’s learning prescription writing. Since I was small, I've been wondering how a doctor can prescribe medications. My childhood common sense told me that there are thousands weird names to memorize. ‘Paracetamol’ was the first drug scientific name I've known. Thanks to TV ads.

"Ubat ini mengandungi kadar paracetamol yang dibenarkan."  at the end of the commercial.

 I don’t know if I’ll have what it takes in prescribing. But there is one key for the medical practitioner to be. Someone said,

“Common diseases are common.”

May I add, if it’s uncommon, then supposedly my Plan B sounds like, flipping pages, Google or asking professionals. Lifetime learning in brief.

A prescription is something which has Superscription, Inscription, Subscription and Refill (the book says this is not usually necessary.) details. Basic format. Not to mention the doctor's signature, obviously. Daa.

“Berapa banyak –cription daa…,” whispered Siti Shahirah.

I was entertained. 

When we're young, prescription is:

-Sakit: Demam

-Ubat: Demam, batuk, selsema.

and

-Sakit: Batuk

-Ubat: Batuk

Excitedly, scribbling amateur signature. At least the concept was there. 

I guess my aunty was absolutely ‘genius’ to get me a sort of mini surgery/doctor-role-play/whatever the thing is ('dang' I couldn't find it anywhere on internet) set as a gift. I was a bit stressed at first because it can mean, “M, be a doctor. Be a doctor when you grow up. Be  doctor…!” ghost tone. 

“Since when Im’ma be doctor?” a statement 15 years ago.

Horizons widen. I love Medicine. I love Pharmacology. Wee.

Amoi 2: Shut up.

M: Wee Wee Wee Wee Weeeeeeeee. Okay I’m done.

p/s: Love knowledge,  it will love you back. Yet, Allah's love is unconditional. 

Someone remember this nasyeed? :) Suddenly  I do.

Little Creatures

Sampai di gerbang fakulti perubatan Kasr el-Ainy dengan hati girang beserta harapan baru.


"Kelas tak ada."


Remuk hatiku, saat akhir kelas Mikrobiologi dibatalkan.  Tak bestnya tak bestnya. Patutlah seorang rakan sebaya berjalan arah bertentang sambil memegang telefon bimbit semacam pegang kompas atau sedang merujuk GPS. Barangkali sedang menghebahkan tentang pembatalan tersebut. 


Katanya rakyat jelata di Mesir akan berkumpul ramai-ramai hari ni. Jadi eloklah berjaga-jaga. Esok barulah ada kelas. Esok masih ada. Assignment Farmakologi masih tak siap. Go M go!


p/s: obsesi terhadap Mikrobiologi makin memuncak.

Atenas Hostel: Being Thin is Good

Percutian ke Sepanyol dah lama berlalu pergi. Menjejak semula Kaherah pada 5 Februari 2012 kala bandar ini masih berbunyi-bunyi walaupun langit sudah hitam pekat. Pasti aku rindui Sepanyol dan orang-orangnya terutama sekali Anna. 

Daku letak dua beg kecil bersebelahan, tenung lama-lama kemudian meminta pendapat taulan pula. 

"Mana satu paling okay bagi kat mak-mak?"

"Yang ni." jawab si kawan.

"Aku pun rasa macam tu." Muktamad. Sekadar beg kecil yang dirasakan elegan dan punyai aura tenaga untuk Mak yang berdedikasi dalam kerjayanya. 

Siap dibungkus, bayaran tersimpan cermat dalam mesin juruwang, resit diterima dengan senyuman. Kemudian, aku mengalih pandanganku dari dompet ke satu sudut.

"Teman-teman sudah tiada!" Cuak bercampur lucu. Macam silap mata. Memang epic betul. ‘Bertuah’.

Aku pandang muka orang putih tadi dengan riak hairan, dia pun hairan juga. Aku terasa cuak dan terasa macam nak ketawa. Haish, 'malasnya' nak hadap babak macam ni... Dahlah M buta jalan. 

"Your friends are gone..." 

Aku tersengih. Dalam hati, janganlah dia simpati padaku sampai rasa nak nangis. Aduh, tandus buah fikiran. Seorang diri. Jika berdua tak apa lagi. Alah, chill sajalah.

"Ya Allah, cepat-cepat gerakkan hati mereka. Mereka ada budak hilang..." Betul-betul rasa macam anak kecil. Buta Jalan.  So unbelievable that I'm actually 21 this year. Tapi secara refleksnya aku yakin ini perkara kecil. Allah sentiasa jaga budak perempuan yang ‘cacat’ ini. 

Aku pun menunggu di luar agar mudah dilihat. Tercegat macam awek setia yang ditinggalkan boypren. Kemain gitu. Sila datang segera untuk lempang saya. Huhu. Takkan ku lupa udara sejuk malam Granada yang terasa sedang-sedang kerana berfikir secara kritikal membebaskan haba ke seluruh kulit. 

"It's cold outside. Why don't you wait inside?"

Tersengih saja yang aku tahu. Failed betullah M!

"Do you need any help? I can take you to your hotel." 

Sampai dua kali dia tawarkan pertolongan.

"...I don't know what else I can do to help you." Anna akhiri tawaran kedua.

Untunglah, tak ramai Spanish fasih bicara bahasa Inggeris. Aku terus memerah otak bagaimana supaya aku akhirnya dikesan teman-teman dalam masa paling pantas. Haha. Baguslah M, sebarang nombor kau tak simpan. Baik, ku cuba ingat nama hostel. Bermula dengan abjad, 'A'. Atrusa, At... At... 

Perempuan dekat mesin juruwang tadi nampak macam bos Anna. Entah. Aku pun, "Al... At... Al..." tergagap-gagap menunjukkan betapa sedikit yang aku ingat tentang hostel tu. Dia tulis perkataan, 'Atenas'. Familiar to me. Atenas? Gran Via? Familiar names.

Kali ni aku menerima pertolongan Anna. Orang Croatia rupanya, Sedang berjalan menuju hostel Atenas tu, kami berborak.

“You’re married?” aku tanya.

“No, but I have a boyfriend. You?”

Sentap hatiku. Menyesal tanya. Sensitif dowh soalan tu. LOL. Dengan penuh perasaan, “Everytime I like someone he already has someone else!” Tu dia, bercakap macam budak umur 6 tahun tapi itulah jawapan klise aku. Haha.  Awal-awal lagi pun orang kedai tu ingat aku baru umur budak sekolah.

Besar mata Anna bila aku kata aku 21 tahun.  Patutlah concern gila padahal aku dah buat muka setenang yang boleh tak mahu bagi org lain buat ekspresi kasihan. Haih.

Kami bersalaman mengucap selamat tinggal.

“I have to go back to my work, okay…?”

Lepas tu, barulah boleh buat muka cuak tahap 98 dalam bilik takut kena marah dengan kawan-kawan.

Aku bayangkan mereka akan cakap, “Itulah, lain kali alert!” Mesti malu. Nampak sangat menyusahkan orang. Waa. Mundar mandir. Makan roti disapu jem strawberi untuk menenangkan perasaan. Hehe. 

Moral di sini ialah aku terbukti berbadan bak sekeping papan sampai orang tak perasan. Dah banyak kali kawan kehilangan aku walaupun aku di sebelahnya.          -_________-  

Di mana sahaja kita berada, para Sang Buta Jalan MESTI teriak awal-awal, “Tunggu aku, aku di sini.” kalau anda yang terakhir membayar di kedai. Just in case. 

"Kalau orang lain kena baca 5 kali, aku kena baca 10 kali. "     (quote diri sendiri)

Amoi 2: loser betul quote diri sendiri. 

p/s: Wee… Semester baru bakal menjelma. Bestnya bestnya.

Pigeon

Tak sabar rasanya nak habis exam! Nada excited ya, bukan semata-mata nada tak sabar. Teruja bercampur berdebar. Esok setelah sekian lamanya aku bersembunyi di balik sarang buatan timbunan buku subjek Patologi, aku akan keluar menghadap wajah-wajah rakan rakan seperjuangan di dewan peperiksaan. 


Adakah M akan membuat catwalk/datang paling lewat dengan raut diva atau mengajuk supaya persis ahli kaji soalan dengan muka ketat bajet pro/menunggu kerana datang awal? Aku akan lihat nanti. 


Empat subjek yang lama. Insya Allah, berbaloi dan diberkati oleh Allah. 


Delicious vast knowledge to be tested on papers. May it will stain on my mind, heart and soul forever. Thus every inch of this body says, "Alhamdulillah!"

"Do not be surprised to get tumours. Be surprised not to get tumours."     

[Says a lecturer known with his special initial, MF as he was commenting about the numerous tumour factors or carcinogens around us.]


p/s:   Kicau burung merpati tajam berbunyi-bunyi
         Saksi orang tak cukup membaca seratus kali